Bust

Well, AF came December 13th. Not sure what else to say.

I changed my Facebook profile to the new timeline, and got access to my old status updates from years ago. One was from July 31st, 2009. It read:

"It's Friday...Also know as Test Day...I'm nervous, I'm scared (of a negative) but we're gonna do it this afternoon...so...we'll see! *crosses fingers* Please god, please god, please god ....."

It almost made me cry. To think I wrote that then, and here I sit now. No better off or closer then I was then. It makes me sick and bitter and angry all at the same time.

All I prayed for is to get pregnant before October 29th. So I wouldn't have to go to the wedding and see DH cousin. Not only did I have to Go, but I was the only bridesmaid out of 4 that was not pregnant.

Then I prayed..."Just please let me get Pregnant before January, before DH cousin has her baby"

No Dice. Now all I want is to not have to spend another Mother's Day with no child. But I probably won't get that either. I've been trying longer then ANYONE I know. Pregnant or not.

I'm going to try this month, but I think next month I'll take a break. Maybe...I always want to stop, but always somehow find GOD whispering "Try one more time"...