Feeling Good

 I just recently found out I actually have TWO cycles to get pregnant before the October Wedding! YAY!
it made me feel better, but I also had forgotten the dreaded bridal shower. I know there is going to be some drama when I don't show up to this bridal shower, but I just can't do it, with my husband's cousin there it might as well be a baby shower. I can't emotionally handle it.

 Which brings me to my next thought, James and I were talking and we're seriously thinking about trying our best to drop out of the wedding some how. He knows how extremely horrible, heart wrenching and hard it would be for me to go to that wedding, with his cousin 26 weeks pregnant, and a couple of other women are bringing their "new babies". He knows I couldn't handle it emotionally. Maybe I'm a big baby but it's just how it is and who I am. It hurt's more then anything I've felt, and I've been through some horrible things in my life. But on a lighter note . . .

 I am feeling great lately! I feel very optimistic and good. I have met some wonderful people recently and I'm even getting the opportunity to do graphics commissions which is something I've ALWAYS wanted to do!
James and I even ordered some OPK's which should be here any day now, and I've started temping.

 Temping is very frustrating though, it's hard because after everything I've read, I was under the impression that everything had to be perfect. You had to get at least 3 hours asleep without waking, take it at the same time everyday and take it before you do anything, even speak. So here I am, waking myself up every time I roll over, wondering if I should take my temperature, had it been enough time? then thinking I probably ruined it by being awake for 45 seconds. Turns out it's not that hard.

 All in all, things are good! can't wait to find out when I O and what my luteal phase length is!